The End

The vigil continued last night, my husband and myself sat up there with Grandpa, ensuring that he got the pain killers every hour. I was so exhausted I slept in a hospital recliner and only woke up a few times.

My husband made sure the medicine was administered throughout the night, and then I took over this morning.

My Grandpa's favorite nurse came in this morning and was sadly shocked to see him still here. She came over to me and said, "You need to go home for a bit, I will make sure he is ok." and I knew she would.

I spent the remainder of the morning tearing up and watching him, thinking about all the good times we had and how much he loved me.

My uncle/brother, who has lived with my grandparents for years, showed up to see his step dad. We talked, it was mainly about the will, speculations about what is in it and who gets what. We talked about the house and about the stuff in the house.

I have asked that they separate their stuff, as other family members have expressed interest in wanting some of the items. I am all for people taking something special that makes them think about a loved one, so I encourage it.

The conversation did not go well and I finally asked that we not talk about this while I am holding my vigil for this great father.

I left around noon, and stopped and had a salad for lunch. I made it home to take a shower and sit for a moment before the little girls showed up from school. After bathing them I laid down for 30 minutes, my body is seriously exhausted. I took the 9 year old to dance and then headed up to the hospital.

I was in the parking lot getting ready to head in when Grandpa's brother called to tell me he had taken his last breath. I thought I would feel guilt for not being there, but I felt relief that his only brother was able to be there for that moment.

My uncle and I made phone calls while standing on either side of the bed. He called his children and his sister that has been very close to us and helped us keep vigil as well.

I called my Grandpa's children and let them know.

My uncle went to pick up my aunt and while he was gone his daughter called to check on Grandpa, she had missed the message. She told me that when she had Grandpa to dinner 6 months ago that he praised me and was so proud of me.

He never really said it much, but I knew he was proud of me. It was so nice to hear that at this time.

This man was such a great man. He was so well loved and like by so many. He touched lives that I am just now learning about. If we had a memorial, that place would be packed, standing room only.

Grandpa was against a memorial, and has asked that we skip it. I am here to ensure that his wishes are met and what he wanted is accomplished. I will fight for this man until the end. I will not allow anyone to disrespect his memory.

He received his death with dignity, I stayed with him until they took him down to the morgue.

Grandpa, you will be missed more than you will know.